The righteous hate
I appeal to millions with my "cute" child-like scrawl.
I am the favorite of administrative assistants, receiptionsts, spammers, teenagers, and that boiling cauldron of white-collar sewing circles, the corporate communications department.
I am neither like comic type nor am I entirely sans-serif.
I am a bad idea, ill-conceived and propagated by monopoly.
I squat in the fonts folder, but I am by no mesure a typeface. I am the unfont.
I was designed for Microsoft Bob. Don't ask.
I am the mark of lazy web design.
I am both precious and common...in the British sense.
Since my daddy gives me away, I am the standby of the commercial cheap who are unwilling to shill a meager $10 fee to license a quality typeface for their signage and their mailers and their precious little awnings.
I am chosen not by my nonexistant virtues than by the fact that I am neither a Times New Roman nor Arial and that the letter "C" is higher on the list than Verdana or Tahoma.
I mock Trebuchet MS, my elegant, urbane older brother. He'd be nothing if the bloggers hadn't come long.
I don't deserve the pixels that comprise me, let lone any paper I might be printed on - though killing trees, for me anyway, is rakish fun.
I am Comic Sans MS, I am a villain, and the world shall quake in the style-free stink of my virulent mediocrity.
And you will curse my ubiquity until the day I grace the cold contours of your tombstone.
***
The website Ban Comic Sans [http://bancomicsans.com/], has taken the abolition of the Evil Unfont to the appropriate level of crusade. And this guy [http://www.robinjohnson.f9.co.uk/comicsans.html] explains why he hates Comic Sans too.
Fontographer Vincent Connare defends the indefensible here [http://www.connare.com/comic.htm].
...
Postscriptum
Tonight, myself and my guests watched Death to Smoochy on Comedy Central. Yeah, it's about as mean spirited and bad as most critics said. But...get this...
The end credits were rendered in Comic Sans MS!
The evil of the unfont is wily and virulent. Beware! The fear is healthy!
We need to write a virus that replaces Comic Sans with something better. Any ideas?
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