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directorcommentary | jasonbentley.org

Jason Bentley, Santa Clara, California: writing, photography, graphic design, music, audio, video, technology, life

If Blair's his poodle, Musharraff's his shih-tzu

Check out this clip of The Daily Show fromon December 6, 2004, courtesy of onegoodmove.org.

This clip is all the more delightful because of the "Beanie Baby Offensive" story that runs in the scroll underneath Wolf Blitzer and General Pervez Musharraff.
"Beanie Baby offensive in Iraq: Three Michigan women are behind effort to ship thousands of donated Beanie Babies to U.S. troops for disribution..."
It cuts off there, but one can easily imagine Rumsfeld telling the assembly, "I know you're stuck with the army you have, so you're often sitting ducks, but don't worry - Beanie Babies are on the way. Some are even shaped like little ducks. But many are not."

Jeez...I'm starting to get snooty now that the election's sunk in. John Stewart's so damn cute!

No warm fuzzies for Rummy and Bush

A week after President Bush announced that Donald Rumsfeld would keep his post as Secretary of Defense and trumpted the DoD's feel-good "America Supports You" troop campaign, the troops responded with a resounding, "Prove it!"

Today, Bush was left scrambling to save face for himself and his Secretary of Defense after Rumsfeld faced respectful but blistering criticism over poor planning and substandard equipment during a Q&A session with troops. One soldier asked, "Now why do we soldiers have to dig through local landfills for pieces of scrap metal and compromised ballistic glass to up-armor our vehicles, and why don't we have those resources readily available to us?" to rousing applause from the assembled troops. Rumsfeld asked him to repeat the question, claiming he hadn't heard the first part.

Rumsfeld's answer included "You go to war with the Army you have. They're not the Army you might want or wish to have at a later time." Well, that's reassuring. Evidently preparedness has nothing to do with war planning. At one point, Rumsfeld stared silent and blank-faced for so long the troops started to snicker.. Rumsfeld took the tone of a dotty grandfather and told the troops to "settle down" before begging their patience with a feeble "I'm an old man and it's early in the morning." Feeling safer, America?

Today, Rumsfeld cleared things up: "I don't know what the facts are but somebody's certainly going to sit down with him and find out what he knows that they may not know, and make sure he knows what they know that he may not know, and that's a good thing. I think it's a very constructive exchange."

Bush joined in the excuse-making today. "The concerns expressed are being addressed, and that is, we expect our troops to have the best possible equipment. And if I were a soldier overseas, wanting to defend my country, I'd want to ask the secretary of defense the same question." Yeah, well, maybe you should ask him the question as the Commander in Chief. Thanks for your personal commitment, Mr. President. I know it's hard work being President.

For the eye-rollers out there, more and more progressive commentators are beginning to connect the dots between the Bush star chamber and the rise of the Nazis. Check out Maureen Farrell's column on BuzzFlash.com.

Photo ©Reuters

Mondo Macchio!



Oh, how I regret not being in New York to see It's Karate, Kid!, a musical based on, well, The Karate Kid. It looks pretty campy, which is just what the material needs. There's a few downloadable mp3s at their website, and the songs are all done in various 1970's Asian grindhouse styles. Be sure to listen to "Wax On, Wax Off." Kevin Smith Kirkwood (Mr. Miyagi) tears it up!

Tarantino should option the movie rights!

All in all, it looks more fun (and has far better songs) than Silence!, the musical by John and Al Kaplan based on The Silence of the Lambs. I dunno, there's something inherently tasteless about serial killer musicals, but you can't help but smile at "Put The Fucking Lotion In The Basket!"

Anyway, I bring all this up because what better way to draw crowds to San Jose than a series of original musicals, done in varying styles by the South Bay's myriad talented musicians, based on movies from the 80's and 90's? If the above are any evidence, it can be done, and it would certainly generate buzz if it were a series. Some suggested source material:

  • National Lampoon's "Vacation."
    Hell, it has great songs on the soundtrack already. Lindsay Buckingham's "Holiday Road," which plays over the movie's opening credits, cries out to be an opening production number.
  • Adventures in Babysitting
    "Babysitting Blues" as a huge, audince-participation house-crashing centerpiece? Bad ass!
  • Revenge of the Nerds
    This one has a largely-original soundtrack, and some of the songs are really fun and bizarre. There's the opening title song, the incomperable "Are You Ready For The Sex Girls?", the supercatchy "One Foot In Front of the Other" and the Nerd Rap.
  • Weird Science
    This one also has a great original title track by Oingo Boingo.
  • Pretty In Pink
    Our Molly Ringwald is out there.
  • Six Pack
    Personally, I think the story of Brewster Baker and his pit crew kids would play really well in a world of NASCAR dads, and it's a fun movie. People like kids. And "Love Will Turn You Around" is a great song any way you cut it.
Anyway, you get the idea. Let us ride the VH-1 nostalgia wave! Especially if the series launched with Revenge of the Nerds and Weird Science back to back, and they were delivered with Grease levels of fun and energy, I think we'd have a regional hit on our hands and definately attract national attention. And I know the local talent is here to pull it off. I've acted with some of them myself.

Dean's list

Howard Dean, December 8, 2004.
"We cannot win being Republican-like. We tried it and it does not work. They want a government so small that, in the words of one prominent Republican, it can be drowned in a bathtub. They want a government that runs big deficits, but is small enough to fit into your bedroom. They want a government that is of, by, and for their special-interest friends. They want a government that preaches compassion but practices division. They want wealth rewarded over work. And they are willing to use any means to get there."